A while ago I sat with my dog on a beach that is part of a nature reserve. Being an adult, and being a law abiding citizen I did make sure that my dog is allowed to be where we were. I had confirmation from three sources – so I was fairly relaxed with the situation!
As a group of people approached me, all wearing sun hats and some with walking sticks, I kind of was sure what was on their minds, and I wanted to put the leash on my dog, but being in a relaxed mood, I was too slow…!!
What happened next was kind of “is this happening to me? What must I do now? Do I want to be part of this? Where can I run to? Well, as expected, my dog, behaved like a dog – she reacted. What was on her to-do-list for the day was to protect me from the people with the sun hats and the walking sticks. And what was on the approaching people’s to-do-list, was to tell me that my dog is not allowed on that beach. So there was a definite conflict of interest according to her and them. As she started barking, and in her mind protecting her family, the man with the walking stick also wanted to protect his family and reacted by hitting her. Chaos – barking, hitting, shouting !!
I first became aware of the hole inside of my body that froze and only there after I could get up and got hold of my dog with the one hand and with the other trying to calm the man, explaining that what he is busy with is not necessary, because my dog might be a barker, but she is not a biter.
What happened there? Was it really chaos, was it normal, or was it actions or reactions? Is it any different to when another car, or a taxi, drives in in front of us and we scream and shout or maybe we get out and start hitting the driver? What happens when we are threatened, when stress enters our body? Our primitive reaction is to fight or flee and when we cannot do any of that, we freeze. My dog, attacked. The man with the stick, attacked. I wanted to flee, but could not, so I froze.
But, I was fully aware of all my reactions, mentally and physically. My awareness helped that I could get away from only reacting to taking action in calming the situation.
Everyday goes by, full of events, things that happen, and we only become aware of our reactions after the result of the actions. We are not aware of the impulse that started the reaction. Will our reactions only be actions when we are aware of our impulses? Will the result of our reactions be less when we become aware of what happens to the body when we are threatened? The body has a story to tell as well. The body actually tells a story before the brain can put the story into words.
I wonder what life would be like if we slow down and first listen to our bodies, before we want to be listened to when we tell our stories?